Recently, I asked my friend Jaime what the secret of his success was with women. He said the secret was having an immaculate apartment. After laughing hysterically for a few moments and noticing he was still dead serious, I asked him to explain.

He told me that my apartment not only had to be clean and well kept, but it had to be decorated properly; no tapestries of dogs playing cards, no duct tape repairs, and definitely no sports equipment. He said the key was silk-flowers that matched the d├ęcor, valance panels over the windows, and doilies. Continue reading “Doilies”