She's Coming Folks PDF Print E-mail
Written by MELMAN   
Friday, 22 July 2016 10:55
First Pirate PDF Print E-mail
Written by MELMAN   
Friday, 22 July 2016 10:44
Open Carry PDF Print E-mail
Written by MELMAN   
Monday, 18 July 2016 00:00
Speed Humps PDF Print E-mail
Written by MELMAN   
Friday, 15 July 2016 07:56

This is a SPEED BUMP. It's designed to slow you down, drastically. You should traverse them at a speed less than 5 mph to avoid biting your tongue off.

Speed Bump














This is a SPEED HUMP. It is designed to slow you down somewhat. You do not need to approach them at less than the posted 25 mph speed limit and in fact, if you go too slow, your shocks won't engage and you may be jarred about.

Speed Hum














One of the streets I have to drive on my afternoon commute has 7 speed humps in one half mile section. I hate it. There is always traffic and there is always at least one person creeping over them which slows everybody else down. This is what it looks like to me:















The other day, as I turned down this street behind 3 other cars, I prepared myself to be disgusted as usual as we all crept over the humps. To my surprise, all 3 cars were experienced me!  None of us slowed down! By the time we got to the end of the stretch, it looked like a scene right out of Bullitt and I was Steve McQueen!















It was awesome!! 

Courage? PDF Print E-mail
Written by MELMAN   
Friday, 08 April 2016 13:26

Trent Harmon, the last American Idol winner, told a story recently about his friend who had committed suicide, and how painful it was for him. It was a moving story. He also shared blog comments from his friends brother that included the following:

“Suicide isn’t glorious or romantic. It’s a very self-centered act … When Daniel put that noose around his neck, he wasn’t just hanging himself. He put that noose around my neck. He put that noose around the neck of my mother, my father, my grandmothers, my grandfather, my sisters, my cousins, my aunts and my uncles. He put that noose around the necks of his friends, his teachers, and all the younger kids who looked up to him.

He is certainly right, suicide isn't glorious or romantic, although I don't think it's ever been perceived that way. It's also very painful for the loved ones left behind, no doubt about that. But a "very self-centered act..?" I would beg to differ. And to say hanging himself was the same as hanging those around him was in my opinion, a much better definition of self-centered. Should they stay here for you so that you don't have to feel pain?

Again, it's a painful loss, I truly get that. But the loved ones aren't dead. They are not deprived of the joys of life. Life moves on for them, happiness continues. For someone contemplating suicide, that hope is gone. There is no happiness, there is no joy, there is no hope. Grief sucks, but it's not permanent.

Debate Clip 1 PDF Print E-mail
Written by MELMAN   
Friday, 04 March 2016 07:47




"Isn’t it true that Lesley specifically ordered you never to kill chipmunks?

Isn’t it true that you blatantly ignored that order and instead issued a code red on poor Alvin the chipmunk?"



"Son, we live in a house that has walls. And those walls have to be guarded by cats with claws. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Elvis?

I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Alvin the chipmunk and you curse the Felines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Alvin the chipmunk’s death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall. You need me on that wall.

We use words like honor, code, loyalty...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps on the sofa pillow of the very freedom I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!"  
Vote for Elvis 2016 PDF Print E-mail
Written by MELMAN   
Thursday, 03 March 2016 10:38

My name is Elvis and I’m running for Chief Pet. You’ve all come to know me over the years as the obedient, thoughtful and loyal friend to everyone. I’ve come a long way from entering the household as a lovable pup to recently being promoted to Lead Canine.

While it’s true that my opponent killed Mickey Bin Laden in 2014, it’s also true that he severely maimed poor Alvin the chipmunk and left him for dead just last year. And while he claims to keep the house clear of insects, he often gets bored and leaves the maimed insects in the middle of the floor where I have to finish the job by eating them.

You need a chief pet you can trust, depend on and come when called.  My name is Elvis and I approved this message. 

Vote for Sheldon 2016 PDF Print E-mail
Written by MELMAN   
Thursday, 03 March 2016 07:21

My name is Sheldon Cooper and I’m running for Chief Pet. I may not have the name recognition of my opponent but that’s because while he was busy abusing sofa pillows and eating his own turds, I was busy keeping the household safe from rodents and bugs.

In 2014, I maimed and killed the mouse known as Mickey Bin Laden in a nighttime intrusion while the Canine slept unconcerned on the couch.

I’ve taken out countless spiders and flying insects, relentlessly protected the homeland.You need a chief pet who is independent, persistent and fluffy.

My Name is Sheldon and I approved this message. 

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